Jester's Dead

Teaching Texas drivers how to drive ONE driver at a time!

Jester — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 02:53:25 +0000

You are driving in the far left lane of a three lane highway (all lanes traveling in the same direction). The posted speed limit is 70mph. You are driving 52mph. It is 5:30AM and the highway is scantily clad with a small number of cars. There is no reason for you to be traveling in the left-hand lane. Oh wait, yes there is, you must be going on a LONG trip. The other two lanes are for short(er) trips. Either that or you must be thinking about that left-hand turn you are going to make off this three-lane major highway in a few miles. Nope, that cannot be it because there are no left-hand turns off this highway. I wonder why you are over here in the fast lane, talking on your cell phone? You must have this lane confused with the “Cell Phone Lane.”

I am behind you, less than a car length. I know my lights are distracting you because I am driving a big truck and you are in a small car. My tailgation (yes, I made up this word – it is a noun – the past-tense act of tailgating – live with it) is my signal to let you know, “Hey, you need to move over a lane OR TWO! This lane over here is for the big boys, you know, the ones that go fast and are not talking on a cell phone.” Yet, you persist and maintain your speed of 52mph despite me drafting you like a NASCAR event at Daytona. I pull over into the middle lane, pass you, then get in front of you. I proceed to slow down to 40mph to demonstrate to you how it feels. It does not feel good to have a slower vehicle in front of you while you are in the fast lane does it? Hey, what is this?!?!? Are you actually going to move over a lane and try and speed up to pass me? Am I annoying you? I do not think so. Get back there where you belong before your car blows up. Oh, and you can go to a salvage yard and buy some used front hub caps to match those two you have on the rear wheels. That is right, stay back there in the middle lane and complain about me to the person you are talking to on your cell phone. Better still, why don’t you try and text me a message?

“Teaching Texas drivers how to drive ONE driver at a time!”, that’s my motto. Do I need counseling?

Total Disrespect!

Jester — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 01:11:57 +0000

What do all these pictures have in common?

height: 340px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama1.jpg"/>

height: 539px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama2.jpg"/>

height: 340px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama3.jpg"/>

height: 370px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama4.jpg"/>

height: 508px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama5.jpg"/>

height: 489px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama6.jpg"/>

height: 671px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama7.jpg"/>

height: 340px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama8.jpg"/>

height: 479px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama9.jpg"/>
For those of you that don’t know it, that’s the Resolute Desk he’s got his dirty feet on. That’s something you just can replace.

height: 340px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama10.jpg"/>

height: 347px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama11.jpg"/>
“Hey quick, there’s the Resolute Desk in the background. Why not run over there and put your feet up on it?”

height: 417px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama12.jpg"/>

height: 765px;" alt="" src="http://www.jestersdead.com/images/politics/obama/Obama13.jpg"/>

They all show a basic disrespect for The White House and its furnishings! The White House belongs to the People of America and should be more revered than to use anything and everything for a foot rest! What all these shots have in common is that they continue to prove that this man has no class!

Warner Brothers Digital Copy

Jester — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 19:35:42 +0000

I recently purchased a Blu-ray of the Warner Brothers movie, Inception. I went to download the digital copy (I paid extra for this version) and I could not download the digital copy because it had expired in May of this year. Let me repeat that again, the DIGITAL COPY had expired in May of this year. Why in the world would a digital copy have an expiration date on it? I contacted Warner Brothers customer support and they were so helpful.

Thanks Warner Brothers, you just made the list. You won’t have to worry about me buying your crap anymore.

The team that got Bin Laden.

Jester — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 10:05:33 +0000

If you heard the president’s speech, here’s a rare picture of the team that captured Osama Bin Laden.

“Thanking Obama for killing Bin Laden is like going into McDonalds and thanking Ronald McDonald for the hamburger. It’s the guy cooking the burger that should get the credit, not the clown.”

Full Pay

Jester — Sat, 21 May 2011 16:50:03 +0000

No one has been able to explain to me why young men and women serve in the U.S. Military for 20 years, risking their lives protecting freedom, and only get 50% of their pay. While Politicians hold their political positions in the safe confines of the capital, protected by these same men and women, and receive full pay retirement after serving one term.

It just does not make any sense.

Monday on Fox news they learned that the staffers of Congress family members are exempt from having to pay back student loans. This will get national attention if other news networks will broadcast it. When you add this to the below, just where will all of it stop?

35 States file lawsuit against the Federal Government.

Governors of 35 states have filed suit against the Federal Government for imposing unlawful burdens upon them. It only takes 38 (of the 50) States to convene a Constitutional Convention.

This is an idea that we should address.

For too long we have been too complacent about the workings of Congress. Many citizens had no idea that members of Congress could retire with the same pay after only one term, that they specifically exempted themselves from many of the laws they have passed (such as being exempt from any fear of prosecution for sexual harassment) while ordinary citizens must live under those laws. The latest is to exempt themselves from the Healthcare Reform…in all of its forms. Somehow, that doesn’t seem logical. We do not have an elite that is above the law. I truly don’t care if they are Democrat, Republican, Independent or whatever. The self-serving must stop.

Proposed 28th Amendment to the United States Constitution: “Congress shall make no law that applies to the citizens of the United States that does not apply equally to the Senators and/or Representatives; and, Congress shall make no law that applies to the Senators and/or Representatives that does not apply equally to the citizens of the United States.”

Bleached…

Jester — Sun, 15 May 2011 01:15:34 +0000

My day lilies have been fighting the sun all day. A nice cool drink of cold water and they’re smiling again.

Rare View

Jester — Wed, 11 May 2011 23:45:50 +0000

Spring is in the air

Jester — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 10:34:53 +0000

Spring is definitely in the air. All my roses are getting ready to explode with blooms. Here are two pictures of a couple of my favorites. On top is the Antoine Rivoire. It has to be my favorite rose. This was the first bloom this year. This rose will bloom well into December. The bottom is my Oklahoma. I’ve never smelled a more fragrant rose in my life. It’s like each bud has been sprayed with perfume. Two excellent roses. Enjoy the shots.

Reminder…April 15th!

Jester — Fri, 25 Mar 2011 17:22:47 +0000

Don’t forget to pay your taxes.

Muchas gracias!

21 million illegal aliens are depending on you!

The Muslim Brotherhood

Jester — Sat, 05 Mar 2011 10:48:07 +0000

This morning the Muslim Brotherhood warned the United States that if it does not stop meddling in the political events of Egypt and Libya, they intend to cut off America’s supply of 7-11 and Motel 6 managers.

If this action does not yield sufficient results, cab drivers will be next, followed by Dell, AT&T and AOL customer service reps.

Finally, if all else fails, they have threatened not to send us any more presidents either.

It’s gonna get ugly people.